Ramblings of an Anonymous Coward

Santa Baby

Musicians have a long standing tradition of adding a little something extra to Christmas tunes, be it the violence and humor of "Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer" or raising [not-so] innocent questions when "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" under the mistletoe. Tunes like Kay Martin's "Santa's Doing The Horizontal Twist" and "Santa's Going To Be Late Tonight" (and for very good reason) began pushing the sexier edge of the seasonal songs with an album cover to match (left).

However, I don't think there is any sexier Christmas song than "Santa Baby", first sung by the sultry songstress Eartha Kitt, whose voice imbued the holiday with all-but-explicit sexual promises. Years later, Marilyn Monroe added the visuals, insuring the song would be a classic for years to come. Monroe's vocals held their own and her curves upped the ante leaving a trail of men wanting nothing more than to be santa for just one night. Then in 1987, Madonna revived the tune, but frankly never did it justice. As Randy Anthony said in his review Horny Holidays: The Ten Sexiest Christmas Tunes "she teeters on the brink of parody" and I completely agree. I wondered for a moment if this song was just beyond the modern artist until I stummbled across a recent version by Australian Kylie Minogue and by god she nailed it! She doesn't bring the same physical sex appeal Marilyn did (and really, who could?), but her voice can warm the blood of any man for sure. Oh the power of a woman's voice!

If you are looking for the downright naughty, Clarence Carter makes full use of double entendre, in "Backdoor Santa", leaving very little to the listener's imagination. Carter plays the role of sexy Santa, bringing his presents to all the little girls whose boys went out to play. Always prepared, he carries change in his pocket to give the kids so they can be alone and leaves the backdoor open for a quick getaway just in case there is no chimney.

An honoroable mention must go to Julie London, best known for "Cry Me A River", when she raises her voice barely over a whisper and purrs "I'd Like You For Christmas". While it isn't dirty, her sexiness sure makes it seem that way. Between this tune and "Santa Baby", is there any question why the holidays are hard for some of us? Va-voom!

Posted by ac at December 13, 2003 03:36 PM