Escaped Words, But Just A Few
thoughts still scamper about in my head. they are disjoined and could best be described as completely incomplete. it is finally quiet. the last word i heard was giggled -- "yeah" -- as they rolled over to go to sleep. and then it hit me as i walked up the stairs. reflecting back upon a conversation the night before and while one can argue whether it was a year ago exactly or not, but keeping the same time frame for it really is close enough.
i find myself sleeping alone tonight, one year later.
why is it that the road's to recovery and self-destruction share so much ground and are merely seperated by a dashed line? maybe it's just me.
But realize that all the talk of the outdated institution of marriage...of the evolutionary misstep of monogamy...of the irrefutability of sexual attraction...is all just cocktail talk. If you don't have a partner that you love intensely enough to make all that talk irrelevant, that's your real problem.
wishing things away is not effective.
i got a newsletter from my doctor today. in one of the articles it asked the question -- "when is the last time you can remember that you felt happy/at peace/joyful and were looking forward to the future?"
strange.
i'm sleepy now and will leave you with what i call my unfinished silly sleep poem...
now i lay me down to sleep
i hope i'll hear not a peep
if i die before i wake
musta been the pills i take
or the drink, i sipped a few
know my last thoughts of you
i'd have endured the rocks and waves
my last breath i'd have even gave
to be taken by your sea
and let your heart stay with me
...
good night.
Posted by ac at July 11, 2004 03:56 AM